Stop Holding Your Breath - An International Women’s Day Invitation

8 Mar

For centuries, women’s voices, bodies, and autonomy have been constrained. Whilst societal norms are shifting and the direction is undeniably positive; there is still a way to go. Culture, learned habits and collective memory are hard to shake – so be deliberate and conscious. Your breath is your power.

This International Women’s Day I invite you to take control – of your breath and your voice.

Holding it together

The empathy and compassion of women are lauded as reliable traits, particularly when it comes to “holding it together.” We are socialised to be the emotional anchor. Holding it together often presents as breath holding or smiling while stressed or during conflict. Making yourself smaller, your voice quieter in a room – these link back in so many ways to your breath.

Breath-Holding Is a Survival Pattern

You may be aware of some the reactions described above. After all, for years women have been conditioned to be agreeable and accommodating – i.e. to not be “too much.” And so we smile, and resolve conflict where we can.

But there is a physiological, unconscious response to stress – breath-holding.

Holding your breath is a deeply subconscious effect of the “fight or flight” trigger in the sympathetic nervous system. When we experience stress, the body responds as if we are under attack; holding your breath is the “brace” for shock or impact.

A stressful email may not seem enough of a stressor, but do you ever find yourself holding your breath whilst working?

Email apnea (an often unconscious, habit of holding one's breath or breathing shallowly while checking email, texting, or using screens) is a recognised response of micro-bracing. When micro-bracing becomes the baseline, the body adapts accordingly and it can result in fatigue, anxiety and tension.

What Happens When a Woman Fully Breathes

When a woman allows her diaphragm to fully expand and begins to breathe fully, her nervous system receives a different message: I am safe.

When you breathe diaphragmatically, the breath drops from the chest into the body, and with it comes grounding. The ribcage widens and posture shifts from guarded to open.

Deeper oxygenation supports clearer thinking, steadier energy, and sharper intuition. Instead of bracing in the upper chest, you will inhabit your full torso.

And from that physical expansion comes something powerful: an expanded voice. Your voice resonates differently when breath is supported. Words land more firmly.

Then comes the exhale; long, steady, regulating. The exhale signals safety to the nervous system, softening the stress response and reducing the urge to contract. You will notice your shoulders drop and your jaw releases. The body no longer prepares for impact.

Breathing this way is not dramatic, yet it is transformative.

A 3-Minute Reclamation Practice

Why not try 3-5 minutes of deep diaphragmatic breathing and see if you notice the difference?

Step 1: One hand on belly, one on chest.
Step 2: Inhale slowly through the nose, expanding the lower ribs.
Step 3: Long, steady exhale through the mouth.
Step 4: Repeat for 6–8 rounds.
Step 5: Ask: Where am I ready to stop holding my breath in my life?

Be the change

When we choose to breathe fully and steady ourselves before reacting, we demonstrate a kind of strength that is calm and reliable. It feels like keeping your shoulders relaxed in a tense conversation with a voice that is clear rather than rushed.

This is what regulated power looks like. And when we practice it, we interrupt the habit of constant bracing that so many of us absorbed growing up.

When daughters see a woman take a breath before responding, they learn that steadiness is available to them too. When colleagues experience leadership that is grounded instead of reactive, trust builds. These are small, everyday moments — but repeated over time, they change the atmosphere in a family, a workplace, a community.

Sometimes breaking a cycle starts with something as simple as one full breath.

Join me for a free, online breathwork session, at midday on Thursday 19th March.

Lisa Winn